What I thought my life would be like when I turned 30! At
ten I thought it was so far away and so old, one step away from the grave, but
I thought I would had have gone to college doing what I hadn’t a clue, but more
over that I would be married, with children and still living in California. My
10th birthday was a day that I still can remember I had a slumber
party “my first slumber party” with my closest friends, Sarah Martin, Martha
and Beca Johnson (Who my mom drove almost an hour to go and pick up since their
families van had broken down or something) I had other girls there to which I
don’t remember, but it was that night I got my American Doll “Addy” and we
watched the Polar Bear King and had pizza. I never thought I would leave my
home where I could smell the salt in the air since my family lived not but
thirty miles from the ocean, a place where I could pick apples right off the
tree, and stay friends with Sarah, Martha and Beca for the rest of my life, but
I hate to say it, but I have not spoken or written to them in over fifteen
years.
My 20th
birthday I really don’t even remember what happen since I was so caught up with
taking care of my Grandma, that year just flew by, I do know that my best
friend and sister from another mother Dana Garten then Chipchase was there and
Sarah Courter then Lucas, and my older sister and Bethany Urbanek also then
Chipchase, and very likely my cousin Stephanie Chandler then Griggs and my
friend Ellie Nasrallah then DeVille, rounding out the Sisterhood. We most likely
watched A Knights Tale, and ate Mexican chocolate cake that I made and had a
sleep over and that is what we called a wild night. I knew that I would be done
with college at that time by the time I was twenty- five and married to a
pastor with kids by the time I was twenty-nine and living close to my friends
whom we would live in the same neighborhood and our kids would be best friends,
and that Dana, Sarah and I would have taken our road trip up the Pacific coast
by that time and that is what I thought my life would be, I thought I would
grow old with all of the sisterhood, but as to be expected the Lord had other
plans for me.
I am now I am 30 and I don’t have almost anything I thought
I should have by this time. I don’t have husband, I don’t have kids, and I
don’t live in the same state, let alone the same town as my best friends. I
also don’t have things that I thought would still be here, like my Mom. At the
same time I have things that I never thought I have, fifteen years in the ministry,
a BA in English (let alone working on Masters in English), the gift a of a
gypsy spirit which the Lord gave me and has lead me all around this country to
live in six different states, two all by myself and given the chance to move
back to a place I call home (New Mexico) after fifteen years away from it. I
don’t have the life that I still dream of and know that the Lord is going to
give to me, of that husband, with my big brood that I know is just waiting to
come down and meet me some day. I don’t know if Lord will bring those people
into my life in the next ten years, but I know that is in his plan. I have learned
that you have to take the good with the bad, and not fight the Lord on his plan
for you.
