This Blog does has a PG-13 rating
So we have talked about, the fantasy, what is love now it's time give common sense advice from someone, who has never dated. What I do know is wisdom, trust and respect must come first in any relationship. It's becoming common knowledge that we don't even date the way we use too, from the general lack of etiquette, which has taken over our culture, to the other extreme of not even having a say in who you marry ( which hate tell you folks is still very much out there). There must be some middle ground and every relationship is different and to try to put them in a box is wrong, and say that we need to follow a biblical example, which does not exist since had was cultural issue of marriage, since if you were Greek or Jew you could be married so we can make the assumption that how to find a mate is also a cultural issue and there is no right or wrong way to date. So how then is it we have come to some very different views what is right. Part of it comes from the pendulum, each generation goes from one extreme to the other. My parents came out of the summer of love generation and I came on the tail end of Gen X/ Millenials making me more a inbetweener, but I was taught that the extreme end of courtship, which is exact opposite of what they grew up this not an uncommon story.
So let's talk about dating, when we look at there seem to be two models, the modern hook up culture or the we don't know each other at all so let's get married group. This a black and white, "A" or "Z" situation, so there has to be a middle ground, and that ground I have seen called "Traditional Dating", which getting back to the way our grandparents or maybe even your great grandparents did it, because I want to point our parents did not even "Court" as we in modern church culture, would define it as. It works, better because you just have to look at the track record of the marriages that came out of that generation, tended to last a lot longer, than ours and it’s not because they only dated one person, I personally know my Grandma P. did not, she was a WAVE in WWII, who left her family in Minnesota to be stationed in CA, and she had her fair share of beau i then before she met my Grandpa P. who was ten or fifteen years younger than her. There was a time when a boy would ask a girl out, and come to the door of her home met her parents and have her back by nine-clock and it’s not to say shenanigans did not happen, because trust me they did, but it was place and time that people respected a person honor. I personally feel this is a model we should look at more.
So people try this idea on for size, a the guy ask you out ladies, by calling you up and they call it a "Date" not hanging out and this ain't no booty call, this a moment in time where you go out of your homes, your place of work and spend some quality time together. And whoever does the asking should also do the paying, which if this is your third or fourth date Ladies and you plan this one, you also should pay for this one, but if this first or second guys you should do the paying. Also guys hold the door for her, this not a sign that you can't do it or your weak ladies it's a sign he respects you and wants to take care of you ( and that is not a bad thing).
So that goes about the whole dating thing, now we will talk about sex, yes I said sex. I like the way the "Millionaires Club" Patti Stanger states it "No Sex before monogamy" now if you are reading this you probably agree monogamy means marriage, and that means boys your ding-dong don't go any where near her who-ha or any other hole she got on her body and ladies that means you don't touch his ding-dong (oh and yes I have a whole list on how discribe sex without any words, that myself and grad-school roommate come up with) in any shape way or form. Now I know this explicit, but it is also straight to the point, because sex only comes with respect enough to marry them.
I had a instructor at a school so strict on public display of affection that you could not even hold hands until you were engaged, once tell me and a whole class about a couple, who was caught fooling around in one of the school neighbours backyards while they were out of town. They got caught, because broad daylight people, but the guy when asked why,he said he loved her, my instructor asked but do you respect her. Respect is a quality is something that seems to have left our modern society. It’s not to say it is gone, but since we tend to look at fairy tales, inspiration and not truth or we look at the hookup culture, both example don’t show truth and since all truth is God’s should we not look for truth.
I don’t know women, but common sense is sexy folks and that is something we need to look for in people, and with that comes wisdom. We need seek wisdom, which we are commanded to do in the Bible. We don’t tend to that we believed what we are told and do not study anything out we tend to believe what we are told. I have known people , who are in relationships, because they are told they pushed date because they are told they are weird since they are over twenty-five and not married, which is wrong (and this is not the first time I heard this). God has a plan for you, so don’t let anyone tell you that you need to be in a box. I say screw the box!
Single and You Know It.
More Reading:
10 Traditional Dating Rules
Let’s Bring Old Hollywood Romance back..
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